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Hi, I'm Brett Martin.
I'm a contributor to the New York Times Magazine, and I live in New Orleans.
I genuinely don't remember what made me search for my name on Spotify one day last summer.
It's possible I was looking for a podcast I'd been on, or maybe it was the kind of search that we all do once in a while just to procrastinate or just out of vanity.
In any event, I must never have done this particular search before, because the first thing I saw was a song titled Brett Martin, you a nice man.
Yes, and it had been up there for eleven years.
Now, there are many Brett Martins in this world, several much more famous than I am.
There's a major league baseball player, an australian squash legend, some historical figures, but obviously I press play, and at first the words are generic enough.
Brett Martin, you're a radio guy.
You're a writer, man, you're a reporter, dude.
Granted, these are somewhat uncannily like my life, but I'm just thinking, this is hysterical.
This is my new theme song.
Oh, Brett Martin, you're a wonderful person.
You're a nice man.