Kacey Vu Shap had no desire to return to the Vietnamese orphanage of his youth. As a child, whenever he told people he was adopted, he would say that he came “premade” — that he spontaneously appeared one day at the Baltimore airport, greeted by a new family bearing flowers and kisses. “It was easier to sanitize my story by speaking only of my life as Kacey, who was loved and wanted, than to tell people of my life as Vu, who was abandoned and undesired,” Kacey wrote in his Modern Love essay. Nearly 25 years later, Kacey found himself back at the orphanage with his three best friends and a newfound understanding of what form love can take.
[theme music]
Dan Jones: From The New York Times, I'm Dan Jones.
Miya Lee: And I'm Miya Lee.
This is the Modern Love podcast.
Today's essay comes from a writer named Kacey Vu Shap.
Dan Jones: I remember when this story first came in,
I was immediately taken by the power of it.
It was clearly the most important story in his life.
And it wasn't about traditional romantic love,
but more about self–acceptance through friendship.
Miya Lee: Yeah, I was struck by his bravery in sharing it,
and just kind of the beauty of his ability
to process the trauma he experienced in childhood and come to a really positive place.
Dan Jones: Yeah.
Miya Lee: It's called, 'Why Did She Leave Me There?'
It's written by Kacey Vu Shap,
and it's read by Keong Sim.
Keong Sim: The gate to the orphanage was smaller than I remembered.
Nearly 25 years had passed since I lived there.
I wondered if coming back was a good idea.