How To Cope With Forever Parenting

如何应对永远的养育问题

How To!

教育

2024-10-22

44 分钟
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As the parent of five kids, Sadie is no stranger to feeling overwhelmed. Most of her kids have left the nest, but one adult daughter has severe autism and can’t live or work on her own. Facing the end of school-based support services, Sadie has to figure out what comes next for her daughter—and for herself. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Sarah Wayland, the founder of Guiding Exceptional Parents, to talk about parenting two autistic young adults and how to ask for help.  Links mentioned:  Your Child (Young Adult!!) Is Graduating: Here’s a List of Things to Do National Alliance of Mental Illness (NAMI) The Arc If you liked this episode check out: How To Hack Any Bureaucracy, How To Date With a Disability, or How To Fill an Empty Nest. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To!’s executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you’ll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  • I will go through periods of time where I feel great and I'm the best mom and I'm doing well and my marriage is good and the house looks great and then it'll all tank and I'll feel like everything is horrible and I'm a terrible person and I'm not good at taking care of her and you know the world's gonna end.

  • Welcome to how to I'm Carvel Wallace.

  • You know, I've spent the last 21 years of my life facing down parenting questions, sometimes as a parent and other times as a parenting advice columnist.

  • And what I've seen is that there are some parenting questions that have pretty clear answers, like how to handle bedtime or what to do with a kid who won't eat vegetables.

  • But there are some questions that not only don't have easy answers, they really don't have a solution at all.

  • And those ones usually have to do with the fact that parenting is just hard.

  • It's hard to be responsible for someone else.

  • It's hard to love someone so much that you would do anything for them.

  • And it's hard to never get a break from that.

  • And so sometimes the question isn't what do I do to fix this?