As we dig deeper into Jo’s history, we tackle one of the many confusing aspects of their childhood: their paternity. We navigate the many twists and turns around the father figures in Jo’s life. From abusive men in the home to a secret father they never knew about, we unravel another complex layer of Donna’s deceptions. We hear more from Jo’s sister Crystal and talk to Jo’s biological father, Reza, about what it was like to be on the other side of the big lie. *A note that this episode does include mention of sexual assault and may be difficult for some listeners. Please take care. *** Links/Resources: Preorder Andrea's new book The Mother Next Door: Medicine, Deception, and Munchausen by Proxy Click here to view our sponsors. Remember that using our codes helps advertisers know you’re listening and helps us keep making the show! Subscribe on YouTube where we have full episodes and lots of bonus content. Follow Andrea on Instagram for behind-the-scenes photos: @andreadunlop Buy Andrea's books here. To support the show, go to Patreon.com/NobodyShouldBelieveMe or subscribe on Apple Podcasts where you can get all episodes early and ad-free and access exclusive bonus content. For more information and resources on Munchausen by Proxy, please visit MunchausenSupport.com The American Professional Society on the Abuse of Children’s MBP Practice Guidelines can be downloaded here. National Sexual Violence Resource Center Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Just a heads up that there are mentions of child sexual abuse in this episode, so please take care.
Those of you who are longtime listeners of this show will know that I started my work with Munchausen by proxy because of a novel that I wrote that was based on my family experience.
And that when I wrote that novel, I was pregnant with my first child, my daughter, Fiona.
Becoming a mom put the specter of this abuse in a stark new light for me.
Being a new mom brought me a lot of joy, but it also brought this crushing anxiety that something could happen to this tiny, fragile being who was suddenly in my life and at the center of it.
And I know this is not specific to my experience.
You become a parent and overnight you have this sudden, horrible new worst case scenario that something could happen to your baby, that you're not going to be able to protect them from everything.
And the thought of making my daughter sick on purpose, which is what I believe my sister has done to her own children, unfathomable, just doesn't begin to describe it.
And all of this just made me come face to face with how dark this series of events in my family really was, because I had to look at it.
And I really understood for the first time on a visceral level, how far gone a person would have to be to do something like that.
How, absent that maternal instinct, or, honestly, any real capacity for empathy would have to be in order to harm your own child in such a premeditated way.
And now I say maternal instinct because according to the data, 96% of known perpetrators of Munchausen by proxy are mothers.
Even with all the stress, I really love being a mom.
And ive loved watching my husband become a dad.
My kids are really lucky.
Hes a really good one.
So this brings me to the other side of the question.
How could any father let this happen to his child?
So the fathers in these cases, as ive learned, really run the gamut.
On the one hand, you have dads like the ones that we talked to in season one.