Gather round fuckettes, it’s time to discuss the highs and lows of the Spring 2025 collections. We get into Valentino’s septum piercings, Alexander McQueen’s bumster revival, Gucci’s flop era, Chloe’s return to form, Alaïa’s Carrie Bradshaw-esque bandeau tops, Simone Rocha’s tutus , Ferragamo’s fabulous ribbon sandals, Dolce & Gabbana’s half-baked Madonna homage, Balenciaga’s lingerie kink, Erdem’s Radclyffe Hall tribute, Saint Laurent’s butch excellence, Bottega Veneta’s rabbit rabbit moment, Loewe’s hoop skirts, Prada’s information overload, Balmain’s Warholian Kardashian dress, Schiaparelli’s shocking pivot, the return of Vetements’ bootleg Isabelle Huppert, and Kylie Jenner’s princess moment at Coperni.