A round-up of this week’s news stories, including Robert F Kennedy Jr’s exit from the US presidential race. Plus: Donald Trump returns with more memorabilia and an extra-special incentive, and a message from beyond the grave from Lord Sainsbury to the National Gallery. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
We learned this week that Robert F.
Kennedy Jr.
Oh no.
Well, yes, has not been content during his eventful, if not infrequently inexplicable life, to restrict his peculiar interactions with dead animals to dumping roadkill bear cubs in New York City parks.
We learned the longtime conservationist allegedly sawed the head off a dead whale back in 1994 after it washed up on a Massachusetts beach.
Kennedy reportedly cut off the whale's head and then bungee corded it to the roof of the family minivan before driving it across state lines to bring it back to his New York home so he could study the skull.
And come on, who among us has not sawed the head off a beached whale, strapped it to the roof of our car and driven it home with the intention of presumably boiling away the blubber and contemplating its bones?
But we learned that too the considerable regret of compilers of whimsical news reviews who assumed we'd have an easy few more months of similar RFK related nonsense revelations, possibly to include on form that he owns socks made from the skin of Harambe the gorilla that he will henceforth desist from seeking the presidency of the United we think Hard to tell.
I want everyone to know that I am not terminating my campaign, I am simply suspending it and not ending it.
We learned, indeed, that he still seems to be clinging to some hope, if little dignity, and if enough of you.
Do vote for me and neither of the major party candidates win 270 votes, which is quite possible in fact, today our polling shows them tying at 269 to 269, and I could conceivably still end up in the White House in a contingent election.
We did not learn, if we're honest, exactly how this would work, largely because we surmise that looking into it in any great depth would be a complete waste of our time, not least because we learned that RFK was instead going to encourage his several voters to support this guy.
He is a great person.
I've known him for so long, for the past 16 months, Robert F.
Kennedy.
Jr.
From which we learned, or at least absorbed, that all future references to Senator J.D.
vance as Trump's running mate may have to be suffixed with as of this recording, especially if Trump's very good friend of 16 entire months can persuade him.
Of this and his pick as vice president is a salute to the CIA and to the intelligence community and to the military industrial complex, though that would.
Of course necessitate Donald Trump Donald Jehoshaphat Trump believing A whole bunch of mad foil hatted gibbering that sounds like it was copy pasted from your Uncle Keith's Facebook page.