Lesson 52
Mud is mud
Why did Harry decide to give up his little game?
My cousin, Harry, keeps a large curiously-shaped bottle on permanent display in his study.
Despite the fact that the bottle is tinted a delicate shade of green,
an observant visitor would soon notice that it is filled with what looks like a thick, greyish substance.
If you were to ask Harry what was in the bottle, he would tell you that it contained perfumed mud.
If you expressed doubt or surprise, he would immediately invite you to smell it and then to rub some into your skin.
The brief experiment would dispel any further doubts she might have.
The bottle really does contain perfumed mud.
How Harry came into the possession of this outlandish stuff makes an interesting story which he is fond of relating.
Furthermore, the acquisition of this bottle cured him of a bad habit he had been developing for years.
Harry used to consider it a great joke to go into expensive cosmetic shops and make outrageous requests for goods that do not exist.
He would invent fanciful names on the spot.
On entering a shop,
he would ask for a new perfume called 'Scented Shadow' or for 'insoluble bath cubes'.
If a shop assistant told him she had not heard of it, he would pretend to be considerably put out.
He loved to be told that one of his imaginary products was temporarily out of stock
and he would faithfully promise to call again at some future date, but of course he never did.
How Harry managed to keep a straight face during these performances is quite beyond me.