#798: Terry Real, Relationship Coach — Tools and Practices for Couples

#798:特里·瑞尔,关系教练——情侣工具与练习

The Tim Ferriss Show

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2025-03-06

40 分钟
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单集简介 ...

For this episode, I’m doing something a bit different. I’m featuring five chapters from the audiobook Fierce Intimacy by Terry Real. What you will hear in this episode will help you identify both your and your partner’s losing strategies in relationships, and help you move from disharmony to repair. Terry is the creator of Relational Life Therapy, or RLT, which underpins all his books, courses, and teachings and equips people with the powerful relational skills they need to make love work. He is also the author of five books, including the New York Times bestseller Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship.  And if you’d like an extra dose of calm, I recommend checking out Henry Shukman, a past podcast guest and one of only a few dozen masters in the world authorized to teach Sanbo Zen. Henry’s app, The Way, has changed my life. I’ve been using it daily, often twice a day, and it’s lowered my anxiety more than I thought possible. For 30 free sessions, just visit thewayapp.com/tim. No credit card required. Excerpted from Fierce Intimacy: Standing Up to One Another with LOVE by Terry Real (Sounds True, 2018.). Used with permission. * For show notes and past guests on The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast. For deals from sponsors of The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast-sponsors Sign up for Tim’s email newsletter (5-Bullet Friday) at tim.blog/friday. For transcripts of episodes, go to tim.blog/transcripts. Discover Tim’s books: tim.blog/books. Follow Tim: Twitter: twitter.com/tferriss  Instagram: instagram.com/timferriss YouTube: youtube.com/timferriss Facebook: facebook.com/timferriss  LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/timferriss Past guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, Margaret Atwood, Mark Zuckerberg, Peter Thiel, Dr. Gabor Maté, Anne Lamott, Sarah Silverman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, and many more. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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单集文稿 ...

  • Hello, ladies and germs, boys and girls, this is Tim Ferriss.

  • Welcome to another episode of the Tim Ferriss Show.

  • For this episode, I'm going to offer something a little different.

  • I'm going to introduce you to Terry Real.

  • Terry Real is by far the best relationship coach, the best couples therapist I have ever met.

  • He does not just parrot back questions.

  • If you ask him what he thinks, he will not just ask you what you think.

  • He has strong opinions, positions, he says it straight.

  • And first and foremost, he has a toolkit.

  • He has practices that are incredibly helpful for couples.

  • And his name has come up with various friends ranging from Kevin rose to Dr. Peter Attia.

  • And he does not disappoint.

  • So in this episode, because he is very, very hard to get a hold of for direct client work, you will get to, in effect, hear him like you would in a real session.

  • And I've done real sessions with him.

  • So what you'll hear in this episode and learn, among other, are, number one, that relationships are not always harmonious.

  • And that'll be obvious to anyone who's been married for a while, for instance.

  • But it is a constant cycle of harmony to disharmony and then repair.

  • So the critical skill set is repair.

  • And what I'm going to share in this episode, because I was so impressed by it, are a few chapters from his book Fierce Intimacy.

  • And this will provide you with a map for identifying losing strategies and replacing them with winning strategies.